I shall begin the study of Magick with a review of myself. For one knows that it is dangerous to practice such without full knowledge of your own character, personality, strengths, and weaknesses. To be honest with yourself is hard at times, but this will be explored first. This first page is my strengths; the second, my weaknesses. Afterward I will study as to how to turn my weaknesses into strengths.
The Good......
I'm physically attractive with a dainty but proportioned body. I have very elven features – small pointed ears and large almond shaped eyes, of which shine brown, green, gold, and blue. All eye colors in one. My hair is a dark-chocolate brunette. Due to the petite features of my face I keep my hair short (as my friends and co-workers call it, a pixie cut – my boyfriend just calls it sexy). My breasts are smaller like all elves, and my ass is very well shaped (or so I've been told on many occasion – no, not by just my boyfriend--sheesh). My olive complexion looks good even without a tan. My fingernails have a mind of their own and the ability to grow fast, strong and seem to keep very good shape naturally. My limbs and fingers would be considered slim and willowy.
Like all good elves I have an innate, almost impeccable balance. The elements dance through me making my movements graceful and natural. I don't have a problem finding rhythm, be it music, wind, rain, flame, or stone, tree, snake, breathing – I can find it. Everything has rhythm and they all speak to me.
I can also feel energies from animals (people too but mostly from animals). The stronger the connection with the animal, the easier it becomes. I've always been surrounded by animal friends. They, often times, are easier to understand then humans. I noticed that fact even as a very young child. Therefore, I made it a goal to study humans. Unfortunately I can predict their way of thought and their personality traits with almost a hundred percent success rate. I say unfortunately because animals are so much more pure and so less full of bullshit. Rarely am I surprised by someones actions. I may not understand the actions themselves, but I can understand the path, thought and energy, toward that action. With an open mind I can accept most everyone's actions regardless if they surprise me or not.
I am able to tap into the spirit realm at times. I have made contact with a few guides. One of which is my twin flame, guide, and protector – the male enlightened shining one, Belrizzo. Another is my guide, medicine, and strength – Kodiak brown, Garamore. One other is teacher, student, magical aid, power, friend, confidant, protector, and more – Chaos Dragon, Lexicon. I used to see spirits when I was younger, but therapy 'cured' that. I'm working at unlearning that 'correction'. Maybe then I can get back to my normal (as opposed to society normal).
I also have a knack for music. If I can hear it, I can usually play it with some practice. Piano, guitar, drums. I would like to get a hold of a wooden flute (Native American in a low D or B). That deep clean wood instrument calls to me.
My will power is special. I don't mind physical discomfort. I can will myself away from anything (and often do just to test myself). Food, cigarettes, booze – just to name a few. It works just as well the other way too. I can set a goal, set my will to it, and make it a reality. There is nothing that I can't accomplish.
I have a quick smile for people that share like energy and if put in the position to have to deal with people on a day to day basis can bullshit my way through pretty much anything. I can play the chameleon and be seen, the center of attention, fun, spontaneous, and find anything in common with those around me, or if I choose, I can not be seen or heard at all – the proverbial wall flower.
I am intelligent and can soak up information like a sponge. I question everything. I am able to grasp and understand complex ideals as well as figure out how pretty much anything works.....again another one of my knacks. I can read something and not forget it...unless I don't practice it. It then becomes like anything else – don't use it, lose it. I can also remember anything that anybody has told me. This can be a blessing or a curse.
Change follows me. Change is sometimes uncomfortable, but change is always necessary and in the end turns into good (even better than before the change). The divine blesses me with change and lessons. I am in the right place at the right time and all things just....fall into place. Never had I a want for money – mainly because of the will and knowledge to get money. But it goes beyond this. I'm always at the right place, right time, and right energy for me to get promoted super fast or get super bonuses, better work, or higher and free education. I also have the knowledge to live off of very little (just what the earth provides) and the ability to not care about a bit of discomfort. The divine takes care of me and sets me up for the future at all times.
I help. Sometimes I think I was put on this earth to lend support and help to those around me. Be it with knowledge, wisdom, counseling, companionship, or physical chores, I find myself going out of my way to help, guide, aid others. Even my work is dedicated to helping others. I seem to be put in that situation with friends as well. They are needing a push this way or that because they are stagnate. I give them that and support when they need strength as well. Some people I'm around get that, then it is time for them to move on. One example of this is Brett. Another is Mary. In truth my whole life is filled with this. Even as a young child my aunt would talk to me about her very adult problems and concerns (from finance, child raising, and coping with the death of her husband). My ancient 9 years of age was just enough for me to realize that she needed to just talk it through, and have someone there that would not judge her on her words or feelings. She needed just an ear. Then she was gone.
I'm pretty calculated. Very rarely do I act or make a decision without knowing exactly why I did that and what the reaction will be. I'm very much cause and effect. If I can't live with the effect, I don't do the cause. I would consider this far sighted. And again the spirits and divine help me with clues on the effect side of things.
10 comments:
I have to say....you've described yourself VERY well.
It's harder than you think. I giggled at times...it's like writing a pros and cons list to decide on which boyfriend to date....what?
I was thinking it was like when you have to list your assets for an online dating site. lol
Ok...thinking back on your fae features. Have you ever heard of otherkin?
No I haven't I'll Google them and check to see if there is something in my Encyclopedia of Fairies. Do you have any suggestions for otherkin reading?
Most of what I've found, I've found off of the net. In fact, I'm not sure if there are any books on the subject at all. Basically, otherkin are a group of people that believe that they are essentially other types of souls that are in human form. Dragons, fae, even inanimate objects like rocks and trees....although I do believe those are more...rare. In some cases, like in dragons, some even feel wings and tails like an amputee would still feel their limbs. Kirlian photography has shown that even though the physical limb (or leaf part, in this case) is missing, the aura still holds true. If otherkin are an actuality and not just some confused people, then I could see that as a possibility. Anyway, with all your fae features and abilities, I thought you might be interested.
I'm always interested in the new. However, if I agree...well...that's another story. Even though one is another kin...and in a previous life was another form...we are obviously in this form for a reason..to learn something only we can learn as human. Holding on the the past can be self destructive.....or that's what I've been told when I look too much in to my past lives. Thanks for the info
I agree that what ever form we are in, it's not a mistake. We need to learn what we are supposed to learn. But, in a way, I can understand what these people are talking about. I don't feel wings or a tail or anything, but sometimes I look in the mirror and not feel like that's me in the reflection. Or, I'll look at the stars, especially Orion's Belt, and I'll feel an overwhelming sense of home sickness. I also do that when I see pics of Ireland, but it's not as bad as when I'm looking at the night sky. I don't know if or what I believe concerning otherkin, but I can sympathize with knowing that this body isn't who you truely are.
Yes I too can see that - and can also see the homesickness - I get that way when I travel. I also can say this - I was told that "..you are where you need to be...you chose this life and resulting lessons..." Therefore, One can go out of state to college and still be homesick - but there is still a degree to be earned....and you will fail if all your energy goes into your being obsessed with getting home or who you are.
Don't get me wrong - self reflection is good and necessary in self mastery (like what you and I experience). However I feel that there is a time and place for such (not like the otherkin reflect)-- otherwise you are blind to the best opportunity/lesson that is right in front of you. If you fail because of misguided energy, you have drastically changed your life/lesson and gained more karma (and another lesson to revisit)
The otherkin are separate energies. Nothing new there --- most humans are other energy...we are not reincarnate souly as human every time - nor the same sex for that matter. The thing is, we as humans are becoming more aware. Gay, Otherkin, mystical, recreation of pagan cults, scientific milestones. We need something to believe in, but must be careful as to what we choose.
You're right, this is our life...we chose it upon birth. Even though one knows that this isn't her/his true form, to waste away wishing to be home is parallel with someone living the lives of storybook characters and forgetting that they have a real one waiting to be lived. In reality, I believe that we are here a (comparatively) short amount of time, so we might as well enjoy it to the best of our abilities. And, friends like you and Jo help make it so. :)
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